Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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