Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
