Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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