Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
