my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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