There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
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