she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
