When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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