They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
