I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize