Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Randomize
