so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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