quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
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