this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
Randomize
