it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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