Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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