you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Be still, my beating vagina.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
