She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Randomize
