We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
All the doctor said was why
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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