let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I deserve this hangover.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
