the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
