I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Randomize
