The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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