Its about making memories worth repressing
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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