I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize