i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
The adults are the big ones right?
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
