and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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