I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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