Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
