I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
