So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
