somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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