woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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