bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
