Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Randomize
