Porn is love you can see.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
