I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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