You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
