Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
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