we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
