it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Randomize
