Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
try to milk me bitch
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize