Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Randomize
