things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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