The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Randomize
