I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Randomize
