I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Randomize
