I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Randomize
