i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
