honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
